Posts Tagged ‘miley cyrus’

Elf Wax Times: Demographic Research

Posted on July 29th, 2010 by a faceless conglomerate

Elf Wax Times offers anecdotal evidence for the majority of its readership. Also, how to fuck a magazine.

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Miley Cyrus Upskirts For All.

Posted on July 24th, 2010 by a faceless conglomerate

Miley and her incestuous pimp offer a fresh take on an old sin, and discuss the benefdangers of sexting.

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Google Googles self, search feature ‘disabled until further notice’

Posted on March 17th, 2010 by a faceless conglomerate

Google collapsed under the weight of its own self-searching, a glitch that has cost many their lives. Why, God, why?

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STAY INDOORS! DEADLY GEMINID METEOR SHOWER TONIGHT

Posted on December 13th, 2009 by a faceless conglomerate

Apocalypse or gift from the Heavens? You decide after we give you one hyper-delusional side of this annual story of Gemini’s Wrath.

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Pirates awash with Windows 7 theft orgy

Posted on November 28th, 2009 by a faceless conglomerate

Pirates have released an automatically-validating, automatically-updating edition of Windows 7. Those giving bastards!

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Online Gamers Constitute 90 Percent of World’s Racists

Posted on November 22nd, 2009 by a faceless conglomerate

Playstation Network is the new face of hate in this week’s edition of The Elf Wax Times. How will Sony handle the cries for help?

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FUCK YOUR BLOG

Posted on November 9th, 2009 by Hateful Man

The Elf Wax Times toils into the wee hours of the morning to bring you part one in an unlimited-part series: VOTE DOWN THE INTERNET, HAIL THE ELF WAX TIMES

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The Elf Wax Times Boasts Monumental Success

Posted on September 21st, 2009 by The Elf Wax Times

The Elf Wax Times has exploded onto your computer screen like a poorly-timed orgasm. Read more to find out how literal this disgusting metaphor really is!

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Neighborhood Puzzled By Shoe-Wearing Power Line

Posted on September 21st, 2009 by wayne

Witnesses have stated that the power line seems to be a size 11 wide.

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I’d like to sext you up

Posted on August 25th, 2009 by a faceless conglomerate

There are little girls who trail behind mommy or daddy through Anytown, USA, staring down into their twiddling hands at what is without fail – and without question – a cell phone.

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Zz4gLSAyNTA8L2xpPjxsaT48c3Ryb25nPndvb190YWJzPC9zdHJvbmc+IC0gZmFsc2U8L2xpPjxsaT48c3Ryb25nPndvb190aGVtZW5hbWU8L3N0cm9uZz4gLSBHYXpldHRlPC9saT48bGk+PHN0cm9uZz53b29fdGh1bWJfaGVpZ2h0PC9zdHJvbmc+IC0gPC9saT48bGk+PHN0cm9uZz53b29fdGh1bWJfd2lkdGg8L3N0cm9uZz4gLSA8L2xpPjxsaT48c3Ryb25nPndvb192aWRlb19jYXRlZ29yeTwvc3Ryb25nPiAtIExvY2FsPC9saT48L3VsPg==