Elf Wax Times offers anecdotal evidence for the majority of its readership. Also, how to fuck a magazine.
Read the rest of this entry »Posts Tagged ‘hate’
Why I can’t do Facebook
Elf Wax columnist and internet rapist Al Stephenson delivers a biting review of the social networking fucksite, Facebook.
Read the rest of this entry »An Alternative Earth – by Adolf Hitler
Hitler had a Plan B: to secretly colonize the Moon, built by troops launched from Antarctica.
Read the rest of this entry »CAPS LOCK ULTRA
Lebal Drocer unleashes a new product on humanity.
“This time it’s legal,” says spokesman Jeffrey Winebergeron.
ANTI-WAR PROTEST IN WASHINGTON, D.C.
Washington, D.C.–Tens of thousands of protesters are expected to gather in front of the White House to protest the Afghanistan and Iraq wars. Elf Wax reports live from noon to six.
Read the rest of this entry »Anti-hate protest results in ‘no additional love’
The Elf Wax Times goes deep into fake hippie territory to bring you a startling exposé of despicable fear-sheep who respond better to Facebook groups than true injustices.
Read the rest of this entry »Eleven dead after release of new McDonald’s “food product”
Micky D’s Darkest Day: McDonald’s claims thousands of lives every year using diabetes, malnutrition and obesity, but today was different.
Read the rest of this entry »Google and the LHC converge to snuff humanity
Our existence is destined to funnel into a black hole of data, in which all 1s become 0s. Google enslaves mankind, only to erase it. Why, Google?
Read the rest of this entry »Online Gamers Constitute 90 Percent of World’s Racists
Playstation Network is the new face of hate in this week’s edition of The Elf Wax Times. How will Sony handle the cries for help?
Read the rest of this entry »The Elf Wax Times is brought to you by…
This is the closest thing you’re ever going to get to a commercial on The Elf Wax Times. Fuck advertising, fuck the media, and fuck your blind faith in the government.
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